Some Really Horrid Vilkyrie!
by NightcatMau
Summary: Valkyrie loves two men, Skulduggery and Lord Vile. But can she have them both? Valduggery, Vilkyrie. RESUMED
1. Chapter 1

A/N: I don't own Lord Vile, Skulduggery, or Valkyrie. Vile/Valkyrie shipping, you have been warned! Valduggery as well, yayeth! Uh yeah, Val's roughly 24.

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Valkyrie sat with her head down, thinking. The said one glance was enough to fall in love, and she'd been told once upon a time that she needed a man whose name made her excited every time she heard it. Or was it made her smile? It didn't matter, because Lord Vile made her do both.

She'd been collecting everything she could on him for years, furtively. If Skulduggery knew he never mentioned it, but he tended to ignore the behavior he didn't approve of with her. She knew he regretted being Vile, he'd told her as much countless times.

So she knew he'd never understand that when she had fallen in love with Skulduggery she had fallen in love with Lord Vile as well. Skulduggery of course was delighted with her love for him, but if he ever found out about Vile...

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Valkyrie paced restlessly through Gordon's mansion. She loved Skulduggery, she did, and he loved her. But lately she found herself wishing it were Lord Vile in her arms and not the Skeleton Detective. She hadn't said a word, but Skulduggery knew, he just knew, when she wasn't as happy.

He'd dropped her off at Gordon's mansion earlier that day, speaking to her before she got out. "Valkyrie? I know there's something wrong, that I'm no longer enough. I want us both to take a few weeks and think about things. I'll contact you, please don't try and contact me."

She hadn't said a word, because he'd been telling the truth, and now she wished with all her heart she'd told her lover the truth as well. But Skulduggery was gone, maybe for good. She paced into the large ballroom that was flooded with moonlight, head down.

The air currents alerted her and she snapped her head up to see Lord Vile. He stood with his hands clasped behind his back, head cocked to one side. Vile's shadows danced and writhed around him, mesmerizing her. He stared steadily at Valkyrie through the eye slits on his visor and she felt her heart skip a beat.

"Vile." She breathed.

He gestured and his shadows wrapped around her, drawing her to him. She looked up, meeting his gaze, unafraid. His shadows still held her, but now they danced and wove around her body, seeking purchase.

Valkyrie closed her eyes and tilted her head back to enjoy the sensation. Then Vile's armoured head was bending towards hers, and the place where his mouth would be burned ice cold against her lips.

Valkyrie felt her whole body arch into the kiss, exactly the same way she responded for Skulduggery. Vile arms went around her tightly, his hands finding all the places he knew she liked to be touched. He pulled Valkyrie flush to his armour, and the icy cold sensation sent her senses reeling.

It was almost too much, this level of intensity, and her vision swam. Vile gave her one last deep kiss and parted from her. He bowed his head towards her then his shadows rose around him and he was gone.

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The next day, Skulduggery called, told her to be ready in fifteen minutes. He was coming to get her. Even sooner than that she was in the Bentley and he as driving towards his house. He said nothing, and Valkyrie knew he wanted her to speak first.

"How did you know?"

"It's amazing what a detective can dig up on people. I'd known about one or two books you had bought on the war, but your purchases, I found, got exceedingly rarer, and only were focused on Lord Vile. I was puzzled at first, even flattered, thought not too much since Vile apparently is more of a man to you then I'll ever be."

His words stung, he'd meant them to.

"Skulduggery I love you, you know I do. But yes, when I fell in love with you I realized I was in love with Lord Vile too. He isn't some other man, Skulduggery, he is you. Since I love you I couldn't not love him, can't you see that?"

"I know that. I realized it the moment I knew who you were in love with. The terrible thing was, I knew he was in love with you as well. That I, as Lord Vile, loved you as well. But last night can never happen again, I was a monster as Vile, I don't deserve your love."

"It isn't about deserving Skulduggery, nobody deserves any of the love they get, ever. It's about me wanting to be with you in every way possible. I'll never mention Lord Vile ever again, but you know I'll never stop loving him."

He nodded, parked in front of his house. He's let her in, took her into his arms in the foyer and kissed her deeply, as Vile had the night before. Valkyrie responded eagerly, Feeling his hands find the places Skulduggery knew she liked being touched best.

Then somehow, it was Vile who held her, and he deepened the kiss and embrace, walking her backwards until she was pressed against a wall, feeling his armour, icy cold, almost envelop her.

This time she withstood his passion better and when they parted minutes later, she touched his armoured visage. His shadows rose up around him, and he was gone. But Valkyrie could already hear Skulduggery calling her from the upstairs bedroom.

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I may have invented Vile/Valkyrie shipping. But wheresoever the heart of the Skeleton Detective goeth...


	2. Chapter 2: Shadow-Walk

**Shadow-Walk**

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A/N: I don't own Lord Vile or Valkyrie. Thanks so much to **Rosalie Storm** for requesting an update. Uh, this is set after the novels I guess, and Val is however old she'll be.

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Valkyrie wondered if she shouldn't skip the meeting that night all together as she combed out her long brown hair. The clandestine meetings with her lover had been exciting at first, thrilling even as he was forbidden fruit.

But things were changing for the worse between her and Skulduggery. He showed little interest in being partners now, even though she had assumed Lord Vile had a way of keeping their time together away from Skulduggery.

Did he know? Was he jealous? Fine, let him be jealous then. Valkyrie had waited years for Skulduggery to say or do anything that showed he loved her, and gotten nothing from him. No kissing, no holding her, no telling her he loved her.

Though she very much doubted what Vile felt toward her was love, she was in love with both men equally and was more than happy to be with Lord Vile if he would be her lover.

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Valkyrie hesitated at the edge of the clearing. This relationship was a really stupid idea, come to think of it. Whatever made her think this would end well? But then Vile spotted her and seemed to think she was playing hard to get.

He strode towards her, then shadow-walked and was behind her, his shadows instantly caressing her. Valkyrie shivered, then gave into the sensation, and then Vile's shadows were seeking out new places to explore and she was giddy with delight.

But it wasn't any good as wonderful as it felt and she pulled away. Vile looked at her, head titled. Valkyrie shook her head. "I'm sorry, I can't, not anymore. If I thought you felt something, but you don't do you? You can't."

Lord Vile said nothing, she didn't expect him to. He just stared at her and she felt the desire and a certain softness she'd never appreciated before drain out of his gaze. It became cold, hard, ominous. Then he was chasing her, and although she knew it was useless to run, she ran.

* * *

Valkyrie had managed to escape, but it was only Vile toying with her, she was winded and her sides ached. A toddler could catch her now. She sank to her knees, and then he was in front of her. Skulduggery.

He helped her up, not saying a word, but she could tell he was every bit as angry as Lord Vile had been. He dropped her at home, saying nothing. Valkyrie sighed and got a bag she'd had packed and waiting out of the hall closet and called a taxi. She'd be leaving Ireland, she had to.

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Valkyrie was waiting in line when the screaming began. Lord Vile was striding toward her through the airport, his shadows writhing around him and there was no mistaking his rage. Armed officers shot at him, the bullets ricocheting uselessly and then Lord Vile was tossing them half way across the airport.

He had to be feeling half way mellow, Valkyrie thought. Usually he just skewered people on his shadows. Vile came to a halt in front of her and stared at her, hard. His shadows swelled and enveloped them both, then they shadow-walked and were gone.

* * *

Valkyrie didn't know what to do. Lord Vile had shadow-walked her into a room in a castle that had no doors or windows. It had to be magical since it was well lit and even though she had been trapped a long time the air remained fresh and cool.

He leaned against the wall, arms crossed, staring hard at her. Yet, he hadn't attacked her, had he? Her heart lurched inside her chest. Lord Vile felt nothing, no emotion besides rage, Skulduggery himself had said so.

But here he was and she felt herself walking nearer, wanting to know why he had brought her there. His shadows rose lazily, but instead of the normal sensual caresses, they formed a barrier between then, holding her at arm's length. It stung.

"What do you want from me?" She asked angrily. "Why prevent me from leaving if you don't care one way or the other? Why?" Vile titled his head and considered her, and Valkyrie backed several paces away.

This _was_ Lord Vile, and there was no Skulduggery to rescue her this time. Vile moved forward, forcing her retreat until he had backed her the entire way across the room. Valkyrie was no coward, the truth was she had no heart for fighting him and he knew it.

Then Vile was kissing her hard, his arms wrapped tightly around her and Valkyrie could feel the tears streaming down her face. She wanted this to be real, for Vile to feel something. But Skulduggery had said- Skulduggery had said a lot of things about Vile, and most of them pointed to them being the same man with Skulduggery well aware of what he did as Lord Vile.

She felt confused, afraid, so she rested her head on Vile's armoured chest after he broke off the kiss and just closed her eyes wishing she knew if it was Lord Vile or Skulduggery that was holding her.

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**Hope you liked it, comments, welcome!**


	3. Aide-de-camp

**Aide-de-camp**

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A/N: I don't own Skulduggery, Valkyrie, Ghastly or Lord Vile. Thanks to **XxbeautifulxX134**, **Kjar** and **ChucklingDevil** for reviewing Chapter 2 and all the faves and follows!

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Valkyrie knew she was crazy. That pretty much summed it up. But even if no one else on the battlefield would help him she had run to Lord Vile's side after he had fallen, struck out of the sky by a beam a pure energy. Too late her mind screamed at her. _Trap! _But she was already on the ground kneeling over Lord Vile and only realized too late that his shadows were massing...

She blinked when the shadows fell, expecting to be in a cave or maybe a castle, even Skulduggery's house. But instead it was the most opulent hotel room she'd ever seen. She looked down at Vile and swore he was grinning up at her. She scooted back and rose quickly, an amused Vile following her. Then she broke out into a grin. "You know they've figured things out by now. No way would anything ever could drop you. Ever." She said and Vile shrugged carelessly.

When he'd shown up to help the Sanctuary in yet another war they had no chance of winning they'd accepted, but only because Skulduggery was missing. And every day since had been a terror for Valkyrie. She feared them figuring out who Lord Vile was. She feared Ghastly's reaction most of all. But then Vile was letting his shadows flow towards her, touching her hair, her face, her lips and she sighed and closed her eyes.

Valkyrie had never had a relationship with Skulduggery, but Vile had been clear about wanting one. For a man who didn't speak his magic said volumes. Valkyrie felt the icy cold caress of his gauntleted hands and opened her eyes. She rose and Vile took her in his arms, kissing her with a searing passion like he always did. Valkyrie responded whole-heatedly, her hands roaming over his icy cold armour in ways that seemed to make him shiver.

She touched him again, running just the tips of her nails down his arms and Vile growled softly. She started placing fevered kisses all over his armoured face, felt him start to tremble. Then she was working on his neck and he was responding, his metal clad hands curling and uncurling in her hair. Vile's shadows rose, teasing at her jacket, slithering inside, finding new places to caress and Valkyrie gasped.

She shed the jacket for him, enjoying the touch of his armoured body against hers even more now. He was so icy cold, like her ring, but all over. She didn't know how he could stand it. Vile caressed her face his gaze seeming to soften behind his visor. Then he was shaking his head and pushing her back gently. "You care about me, don't you? You want something more than just this?" He nodded.

She considered him. "Well I doubt the room is paid for, so no ordering room service and having a lovely one sided craic." She sensed his smile as his shadows reached out and touched the desk, bringing a sort of leather folder to her. The room was reserved for Detective Inspector Me. "You sneak." She said and swore she heard soft laughter.

So she put coffee on and ordered room service. It did feels weird she had to admit that. Here was the legendary killing machine. The heartless, soulless monster who called himself Lord Vile. And yet he'd reserved a room for them. Or Skulduggery had. She figured it didn't matter. But he wanted time with her away from the war and since it had honestly been pretty much over they wouldn't be missed.

Valkyrie titled her head at Vile. "Thank you for this. I think I've had enough wars to last me a lifetime. But there will always be new ones, won't there?" She asked and Vile nodded. Valkyrie after all had been trained by Skulduggery. She knew if they stuck to yes or no questions that Vile would be calmer. She figured he could speak but it clearly upset him when he couldn't answer a question.

She'd become his aide-de-camp the only person the silent general trusted to understand his unspoken orders. She'd never understood before how he could wage war without speaking, but he could and he did it flawlessly. He could still write out instructions and the senior officers learned the read how he would mark the maps of a battlefield. But it was Valkyrie he trusted most of all. Vile seemed to move and Valkyrie snapped back to the present.

He inclined his head to the door and second later there was a knock. Valkyrie went, found the food had been added to the hotel bill and carried the tray in. "You told them to leave trays if they got an order?" She asked and he nodded. Vile watched her eat the same way Skulduggery did and she didn't mind, the general had been protective of her during the war, almost nurturing.

She looked at him and thanked him again and he shrugged. "Now that the war is over-" she paused. How to make this a yes or no question? "Are you staying?" He shook his head. That made Valkyrie's heart break but she supposed she should have expected it. She ate in silence for a while then looked at him again. "I'll miss you." She said and sensed the shock and he rose and went to her, making gestures.

She watched his graceful hands then nodded. "We'll go away together then?" She asked and he nodded emphatically. "I'm the best you could do, huh?" She asked and heard him laugh. It was an eerie sound. Not like Skulduggery's smooth velvety voice. Cold, dead, like a voice from beyond the grave. But she smiled in reply anyhow.

Vile kept watch over her that night and in the morning he drew her into a lingering kiss before handing her a note. It wasn't long, only two words. 'Marry me'

"Yes!" She said her face lighting up as she wrapped her arms around his neck. She felt his smile, heard her name whispered faintly. Then he was kissing her as his shadows rose around them and they were gone.

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**Yeah I know, kind of short, but I am having fun with these two!**


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